Today Jonathan is studying for Sunday service. Every third Sunday Jonathan teaches as well as Mondays, Fridays and occasionally Wednesdays. Today was the perfect opportunity to get the kids out of the house so daddy can study in peace and quiet. Days like this usually mean an adventure, to say the least, for mommy.
I leave the house, hopeful that today will go somewhat smoothly. 3 year old Josiah, 2 year old Christopher and 8 week old Ben are in the car, ready to terrorize the day. As we pull up to Carnivore, a local restaurant and playground, I grab the kid's packed lunch, pull out the stroller and pull out an anxious Josiah and Christopher and a screaming Ben. I can feel my cappuccino on the horizon, just inside Carnivore. We navigate through the parking lot as I crazily banter directions to the kids so they just get inside the doors of Carnivore safely. We get to the playground and the boys sit down for lunch at a nearby bench. Their peanut butter and jelly sandwiches resting on their foil "plates" and the boys begin to eat. I nurse the baby. "Okay, things are going smoothly, I'll just go a few feet away to tell the waiter to bring a coffee." I get up, order the coffee and I look up to see the kids have left the bench to go on the slide despite my directions to sit and eat and then play after they have finished. I give the waiter my order when I hear two screams from the playground.
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After glancing at the expensive prices on Carnivore's menu, I decided to go to the local grocery store to get something more reasonably priced. I remembered they had a small arcade inside the grocery store area and the kids could play. As I approach the waiter requesting the bill, two young Kenyan girls approach Josiah and Christopher. Now, for some reason, Kenyans seem to like to tease our children. I don't think it's because they want to see them cry, or do they? They approach our family and begin to admire Baby Ben and ask the usual question they normally ask when seeing any of our children, "Please, you will let me go home with this one." This absolutely panics Josiah and Christopher. This interrogation lasts 15 minutes until the waiter finally brings back the bill and makes change. The conversation went something like this, "Are these two twins?" (Meaning Josiah and Christopher). "No, they are 16 months apart." "And what's your little girl's name?" "Well, he's a boy, his name is Benjamin." "Please, let me take this one home," the young girl directs the question at Josiah. Josiah, "NOOO! That's my baby." "But I will take him home and he will be my baby." Panicked Josiah glares her in the eye and says, "NOOO, this is MY brother!" The relentless teasing about taking the baby home inevitably leads to teasing about taking Josiah and Christopher home. The panic increases in the boys and I think, "Why do you guys do this? Can't you see that this upsets them?" The kids are in full hysteria as I keep interjecting that they won't take anyone home. Then the girl's say, "What if I take your mommy and daddy." "Really???" I think. I calm the kids down and politely try to move things along as I assure the kids that we aren't going anywhere and neither are they.
We load back into the car, off to the grocery store to continue our adventure. On the way out I notice a Kenyan man in his twenties wearing a bright tie-dyed shirt with the words on the back, "Nifty, Nifty, Someone's Turning Fifty!" Now this isn't the first time I've seen something like this.
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Well, as our day wound down, it ended much like it began. Removing an anxious Josiah and Christopher from the car and a screaming Benjamin. They scurried on back into the house. Another day conquered.